Time is really running out on that practice round you promised yourself you would do prior to the Ninth Annual Coach Harry Groves Golf Tournament and Reunion. Give it up, you know you never keep your promises anyway! But you could make sure they are still there behind the rakes and shovels in your garage. And there will be plenty of cobwebs and bugs to clean off, so you ought to get to work on that.
There is still time to join the fun if you've been reluctant because your golf game isn't up to par. Very few of us are actually decent golfers, and we ridicule them just as much anyway. I once started a round with 2 pars and a birdie (can you imagine!) and still failed to attain my best round ever (104). Gary and Zeb can attest to that one! There are at least three names on The Cup who had never golfed before that day! And everyone can chip, putt and bitch like Coach does, so give it a go. Besides, you get to drive a car WHILE drinking, and no one will say a word. Help the rest of us have something more to make fun of you for by joining in the fray. Your hairline is barely receding and your paunch barely shows, so help us out. Really errant shots are usually rewarded with a great prize anyway.
But if you are still not golfing, no matter what, you can still join in most of the fun with us and even partake in the non-golfing activities we have arranged. Climb Mount Nittany, visit The Creamery, run, jog, walk, or crawl with all of us at the First Annual Alumni Run(Jog, Walk or Crawl). Donuts and coffee will be available. Celebrations will be held on both Friday and Saturday nights at Damon's, culminating with Coach Groves' 80th Birthday Party on Saturday night. A small fee of $10 (to keep our group solvent!) gets you in. Be sure to bring your very own Coach Groves story for everyone.
And here's a great video of Janeane Garafalo and her beloved pets. I think at least one of them listens to Rush Limbaugh!
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