Saturday, February 15, 2014

Is This Something?

"Thousands of tiny holes to enhance breathability and male pleasure."
If it turned out newly engineered shoes were to blame for poor performance of US athletes at the Olympic Games, I'm pretty sure a really big hubbub would be made.  As well it should.

So when the poorest performance of American Speed Skaters (who once dominated the sport) at any Games is thought to have something to do with the outfits they are wearing, I would say the maker has some "splainin to do". The top finish by any American as I write this is 7th. 

Stock in Under Armour slid more than 2% in trading on the first day of controversy, and now the Americans have received approval to ditch the outfits, which more than 1/2 will.  Maybe a medal will now appear!

Apparently, the holes in the back of the suits to enhance cooling actually trap air and cause drag.  It reminds me of a great parody of the Daily Collegian I read in 1976 made in the spirit of the National Lampoon.  It contained a great ad for condoms that incorporated thousands of tiny holes to "enhance breathability and male pleasure".  Wish I could find a copy of the issue.

1 comment:

  1. They are ditching their outfits for previous Under Armour uniforms used in the World Championships, so not really a huge hit to UA. Although I personally don't think it will make a difference because the Dutch are rolling on everyone. Also, ALL of the athletes have to switch, not just half as the IOC requires all athletes from the same delegation to be wearing the same outfit.

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