What Does 34 Years Of Only Slogging* Get Me?

My "career" ended really in 1981.  I ran a few races here and there until 1997.  The only time I really trained following college was for the Disney World Marathon in 1997.  I wanted a 3:30 Marathon and was well on my way until cramps hit my legs at the 17 mile mark.  This never happened before in my entire life, and never since.  It was due to someone convincing me to use Creatine, my only ever PED.  Fat load of good it did me when I finished in 4:01, which was really a 3:53 or so counting the time I spent in the Ambulance Tent waiting for a meat wagon to take me to the finish. When they finally told me it would be along in 4 hours, I got up and finished the race without much problem.  A fitting end to my illustrious career.

Well, 34 or so years of non-training has led to somewhat of a loss in fitness, to say the least.  But as it turns out, only a week of non-training has devastating effects on fitness.  Like 50% in just one week!  I'm skeptical of this, although less skeptical than I am of Catastrophic Global Warming.

*Slogging being defined as the slow jogging I do now on a treadmill mostly. Sigh.