Surely You're Uncertain About the Certainty of That Uncertainty

And don't call me Shirley.

There are just several days left before the Big Ten Indoor Championships.  Both teams travel to the same venue for the first time in the history of the event, as Nebraska hosts the entire conference in a Midwestern hootenanny.  I expect some great fireworks again this year.  So let's wrap our minds around a little Physics to get ready.

Apparently, in an effort to further confuse laggards of the field like me, they've thrown some question into the Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle, first discussed in the 20's.  Just when you get the hang of something a Physicist throws a Whoopie Cushion under it and gets us all flustered.